who i am : soul searching ….

this song mean a lot to me …

it says exactly what i have been facing all this while….

here is the lyrics… read thru , and u will understand ….

Look at me,
I will never pass for a perfect bride.
Or a perfect daughter.
Can it be I’m not meant to play this part?
Now I see that if I were truly to be myself,
I would break my family’s heart.

Chorus:
Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me.
Why is my reflection someone I don’t know

Somehow I cannot hide who I am,
Though I’ve tried.
When will my reflection show,
Who I am inside.

When will my reflection show
Who I am inside.

i have been searching .. and looking who i want to be .. and what will i be …

i think i have tried to be a good human, but human make mistakes .. and i am a human .. i make mistake too…

now there part of myself asking what exactly i want to do , or to be … nobody can answer that question except my own self .. but there is a question i can ask around to improve myself ..

what can i do ?

all by myself …

i am currently singing the all by myself by celion dion… ( i cant really sing … wat ? ok .. got it .. i really cant sing..)

so that y i opt to write down the lyrics…

When I was young ( i am still young!!!)
I never needed anyone (never ??? hang on r u sure ?)
And making love was just for fun ( fun ? says who?)

Those days are gone
Livin alone I think of all the friends Ive known (that is  including u !!!)
When I dial the telephone
Nobodys home (p mana tu aa?)

All by myself
Dont wanna be
All by myself  anymore

Hard to be sure
Sometimes I feel so insecure
And loves so distant and obscure
Remains the cure

eh salah lagu ni … wrong concept … yes i am all by myself but for another thing ….the next song will explain more…

All my bags are packed, I’m ready to go (yes i am!!)
I’m standin’ here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye

But the dawn is breakin’, it’s early morn
The taxi’s waitin’, he’s blowin’ his horn
Already I’m so lonesome I could die ( seriously..)

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you’ll wait for me
Hold me like you’ll never let me go

‘Cause I’m leaving on a jet plane
I don’t know when I’ll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

I’m …

There’s so many times I’ve let you down
So many times I’ve played around
I’ll tell you now, they don’t mean a thing

Every place I go, I think of you
Every song I sing, I sing for you
When I come back I’ll wear your wedding ring

‘Cause I’m leaving on a jet plane
I don’t know when I’ll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

Now the time has come to leave you
One more time, oh, let me kiss you
And close your eyes and I’ll be on my way

Dream about the days to come
When I won’t have to leave alone
About the times that I won’t have to say …

still wrong concept la ni …
ok yg salah ni la yg mo kasi betul ni ..( aik.. cam besa jak ni .. mcm nda bulih lari jak dari tugasan teachery ni …)

so … the right one is…

i am leaving on a jet plane … all by myself … yes .. all by my self ..just like the title of this post!!! yey !! i am excited ..one stamp for my international is on the way … he he he…

have been dreaming of doing this so long ago .. i’ve been keeping the dream for..( hate to talk about it….)  .. but its about time to move on and JUST DO IT!!!! ( iklan NIKE ke…)

to me : have fun and have a safe journey …
to chel : thanks for all the tips…
to bidz : i am waitin for ur story of ur own trip …

ps:leaving on a jet plane all by myself ni gara2 someone ni .. u know who u are .. janji manis jak!!!

rare vs common

we usually can find this flower by the road side…

this one is quite rare .. its come from the same family i think , but different colour.

so between the two, which one attract my eyes more? of course the rare one kan ..

we do usually tend not to give a look to the common thing we saw everyday .. sebab ianya common .. hari2 pun nampak .. so boring la kan .. we want something different …. something yg jarang jarang…

ok now , given something rare .. we will be waa…. look at that … we will be looking at ‘it’ wit amaze, full of attention … kdg2 jadi mcm sakaipun ada…

so what is the conclusion i can do here ?

be rare ? so we will be more noticeable ?

trying to forget someone….

I thought I met the guy of my dreams. This special person is not the only captured my heart, but he did too turns me insane… sleepless night … just thinking of him, turning me up side down.

I thought we were going to be together forever, then we ended up in two different ways, different life goals that only lead further away from each other. I was totally crushed knowing this and it hurt me for the longest time.

Anyway, I’m getting desperate and I can’t seem to function properly ever since we talked about the ‘no future together’. I can’t stop thinking of him and I don’t know what to do but it is really annoying when I have to do lots of other things. I’m also in a bad shape all the time and am constantly day-dreaming (of him – obviously). This is going on for quite sometimes and it really burdens me.

Now that I realize there nothing I can do to fix the relationship, I do too know that we will never be together yet I can’t prevent my feelings for him. I keep longing for him and…. dreaming of the old good times together…..

due to this heart aching situation….i have lost few kilos.. and now drop from size M to .. not S aa…XS .. how small is that ?

The bottom line is, he is not the man .. So.. Cut the crap!!
I am just writing this to kill time …hahaha…. my real point is .. i lost few kilos and yes .. i am on size XS ..

got this piece last week … XS tu … waduuuuhhh .. but look at the price .. ingatkan the lesser the kain they use the cheaper the price be !! d#m!!!

To bidz: jan ko gagaran aa…:P

untuk mendapatkan rahsia XS , u have to call me personally !!! 😛

on my way to happYness….

a story to think and keep me going….

a story of a mommy lion and baby lion …

Young lion asked his mom: “Mom, where is the happiness?”
Mom replied: “It’s on your tail.”
So the young lion keeps on chasing after his tail. But after a whole day of trying, he failed to get the happiness that was on his tail.
Then he told his mom about this, his mom smiled and said: “Son, you don’t really need to chase after your happiness, as long as you keep going and moving forward, your happiness will always be with you.”

* seb baik tu lion is a lion , if not .. abis la kana hantam .. kurang ajaran ni .. happiness on the tail??? sepa yg ajar mommy lion ni … ( aik .. yg mengajar juga yg kena ka? )

here is the best part …

You can’t decide the length of life, but you can control how you want to live it.
You can’t control the weather, but you can control your mood.
You can’t change your look, but you can smile.
You can’t control others, but you can control yourself.
You can’t foresee tomorrow, but you can utilize today wisely.
You can’t win everything, but you can try your very best to achieve that.
Hope everyone can face the daily life positively and always happy…

* its you … how about me ?

i guess i should change all the YOU words above to I …
i am on my way to happyness.. ( remember its happyness… he happiness is in the making .. 😛

Hard Rock Cafe T

yey !! finally i got my very 1st hard rock cafe Classic T ..

and it is all the way from Rome !!! very excited over it … and i am so inspired to be there myself. i dream to have a collection of this T, and be at the place myself.. so … thinking of wat to give me as souvenir ? i am easy .. another hard rock T would do !! 😛

thank you Ai Ling for getting me this one!!!